Slut

Now I'm going to try to make this next part as short as possible:

Now Matt apparently talked to Laura who told him where I was. I lied and said I was at Rachel's dad's house out of town. He said he believed me... I booked it back home. Then later Matt decided to drive out to Bob's house. Bob came outside and apparently knocked off the side mirror off with a crowbar and then proceded to smash out the driver's window. He told Matt to leave then and if he came back he'd kill him.

By the time I returned home my phone was ringing. It was Chris- he told me I was a piece of shit for telling my boyfriend what happened. I said "What the hell are you talking about, Laura told him-cause BOB told Angela." (got that?) Then I heard everyone in the background at the party talking about what a slut I was. Then Chris was telling them how he should tie me to the bed and Matt to a chair and let everyone fuck me so Matt has to watch. It was if he set the phone down and forgot he was talking to me. I sat in the corner of my room with the phone to my ear, just crying and listening. Mandy and Rachel not saying anything just watching me. After that night it was about another month before I see or talk to Chris again. Matt told me all about what happened, but never brought it up again.

Chris ends up calling me a month later, telling me he's sorry and that he wants to see me. For some damn reason I go. We end up hanging out a lot... One night Chris passes out almost as soon as I get to his house. I'm sitting on the couch alone when Chris' older brother sits down and unzips his pants and starts stroking himself, asking me if I wanna ride it. (People just kept amazing me around there) It just turns me on to watch a man do that, I don't know why... but I give in.

One night Chris tells me he needs my car cause he needs "to break up with his girlfriend (What?!)  because she's telling everyone she's pregnant and she's NOT" I was heartbroken. First I had no idea he had a girlfriend. Another I was infatuated with him. Yeah I slept with other guys and I was still dating Matt. But it's like I never said anything to Chris about wanting a relationship cause I knew that's the one thing he didn't want. When I was with a guy, whether it be Chris, Matt or someone. It was all about them. I didn't sit and think about this other guy. Maybe that's why I never really felt slutty. (Boy do I ever now though) I just liked to have sex, with different guys cause everyone is different.

Anyways he insists on driving. I was sober and stupid so I let him. He's driving and scaring the shit out of me. He could not keep the car in his lane AT ALL. I thought for sure I was going to die. He tells me "you know how much I drank tonight? A half bottle of Captain Morgan!" I start begging him to pull over, he won't though. Instead he looks at me and says "You know, I love you, I love you so much Alice." I was shocked and didn't say anything. Then he says "I'd love to be with you and only you, but you know what? I can't. I'd cheat on you and I don't want to hurt you." Thankfully we didn't die that night.